best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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