Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize