If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
