How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Randomize
