is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
Randomize
