She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
