You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
