Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize
