i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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