I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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