I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
