i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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