hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
