I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
In America we eat man semen.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE