i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Randomize
