I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
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