So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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