dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
