If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
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