a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
