is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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