Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize