No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
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