So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Randomize
