The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
