I think i sorta joined a cult last night
he shaved USA in his pubs
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
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