whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
