And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
