you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Please don't give away my fajitas
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
