I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God, you're like boner-b-gone
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
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