Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
