You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
