I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
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Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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