what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Randomize
