Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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