I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
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