Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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