As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
The best revenge is premature balding
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Randomize
