You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
My boob is missing a layer of skin
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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