isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Randomize
