Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
