problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize
