remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
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