She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize