you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
