Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
