was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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