i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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