i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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