I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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