I will die if light touches me.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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